January 20, 2019

Real Talk

Still Angry, But Tired of Marching!

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So when do we say enough of the marching and roll up our sleeves and start tackling the actual issues? And once we start tackling the issues and working to make change, why do we keep on marching year after year? I thought about these two questions a lot this past month leading up to yesterday’s #WomensMarch2019. In 2017, it felt absolutely necessary and urgent and cathartic to march the day after 45, with his Read more...

September 10, 2018

Best Of, Real Talk

Serena May Have Lost, But She’s Not Defeated!

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There is something about this image that had me staring at it all day yesterday and this morning too. This is Serena Williams after her blow-up, not meltdown, with umpire Carlos Ramos who accused her of cheating during yesterday’s match at the 2018 US Open final. This is Serena Williams, 23-time Grand Slam singles champion, sitting in the wake of sexism and racism’s microaggressive fuckery. This image is heartbreaking. It’s sobering. It’s a reflection. Read more...

August 31, 2016

Real Talk

Nate Parker: When Black Power Meets Rape Culture

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Ah Nate Parker. This has been extremely challenging for me to process. I wasn’t so much disappointed by the news of his rape case as I was offended. Nate Parker has disappointed me in the past with other choices and comments he’s made, but not this. And his recent comments were almost more offending than the incident itself because it showed that 17 years later this dude had convinced himself that he had done nothing Read more...

November 23, 2015

Best Of, Real Talk

You Never Know! (It’s not always #BlackGirlJoy)

After a mountaintop experience with Carrie Mae Weems and my college bestie Kim last weekend in DC, I returned to NYC on Monday. That same night I had an awesome time at a cocktail mixer. I engaged with literary agents, editors and other writers and was feeling uber inspired as a creative and as a Black woman. Then I decided to take the bus back uptown to Harlem after the Writers & Wine event and Read more...

June 5, 2015

Lifestyle, Real Talk

#CountMeOUT: Wangechi Mutu & Toshi Reagon

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“I am not free while any woman is unfree, even when her shackles are very different from my own.” -Audre Lorde

theHotness celebrates and partners with Black queer women this month in our #CountMeOUT campaign that links African and African-American women– both queer and straight in conversations and hopefully in a movement that expands the ways in which we think about community, activism and sisterhood.

In launching #CountMeOUT, I will present a series of Read more...

May 25, 2015

Real Talk

Dear Chris Brown: An Open Letter

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Dear Chris Brown, Mentally Ill Black Women Need Counseling, Not A Good Lay:

When you returned home on Wednesday, May 6th I know you surely had a WTF moment. Discovering that your home was broken into, seeing your cars vandalized and finding a naked woman, whom you didn’t know, in your bed had to be shocking, infuriating and maybe even a little scary. You were violated by a young woman who by all accounts, even Read more...

May 19, 2015

Real Talk

Black Power Without Black Women Is Weak

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“The most disrespected person in America is the Black woman, the most unprotected person in America is the Black woman. The most neglected person in America is the Black woman.” – Malcolm X 

When most people think about Malcolm X they immediately think of Black manhood leading to associations of Black power tied exclusively to the work of Black men. This is most likely a case of people not knowing that our own Black shining Read more...

March 27, 2015

Real Talk, TV/Film

“GIRLHOOD” Screening & Discussion in Harlem!

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This Saturday, March 28th, in partnership with Imagenation Cinema Foundation, theHotness.com is hosting the 7:30pm screening of the critically acclaimed film Girlhood. Please join me as I moderate a post discussion with panelists Yvette Russell (former ESSENCE Entertainment Editor & current Director of Programs for READ Alliance), Shawanna Bell (Program Coordinator at Young Life), and Genesis Mullen (Young Life member) along with girls from the Harlem chapter of Young Life for Read more...

July 18, 2014

Real Talk

Standing On The Corner of Self-Realization & Joy

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“You meet all kinds of people that help put life in perspective and turn the horror into some kind of lesson or avenue of awakening that lives with you all your days.” -Ruby Dee

“Stand still inside yourself and know who you are.” -Dr. Maya Angelou

If you’ve seen me walk you know I walk hard and in typical New Yorker form, I rarely stand still. Exactly a month ago, after just leaving my office Read more...

February 28, 2014

Real Talk

Trust A Big Butt & Never Mind The Smile

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“Hey beautiful, come on, smile.”
“Aww baby, smile, it can’t be that bad.”

I don’t know you. I’m not your baby. And yes, homey, it is that bad! I can’t tell you how often I have to deal with some man telling me to smile. Seriously Chanel Iman is asked to smile less and she’s in the business of smiling. It’s not cool. It’s not friendly banter (you’d need to be my friend for that) Read more...